I’m Alive! What I’ve Learned this Summer

Pic Credit: Tumblr

It has been quite a while since I have blogged. This summer has been so busy being filled with an intense summer class and intense hours at work. However, I am back and better than ever! Despite the fact that nothing truly exciting happened to me this summer other than lunching at Ray’s Boathouse with my mom and filling my library full of books, there have been much learned by me this summer.

1. Cooking is enjoyable: There is something about cooking your own meal that leaves not only a satisfaction, but a relief of knowing what went into it! From friends, ideas on Tumblr (I’m not a Pinterest girl), and watching my own mother and her clean eating ways — I’ve developed some great recipes that are incredible and very healthy It took me a while to want to cook and to start cooking. I used to do quick pasta and eggs, but now I’ve ventured into various meals. It’s been an exciting adventure for me!

2. Houseplants are dangerous: Throughout this summer, my mom and I have been working on the decor and finishing up various projects for my apartment. Her open summer schedule allowed her to come down and help me with decorating, polishing up, and finding better furniture for my apartment. This includes encouraging me to buy my first house plant. I am hooked! I love having the plant in my home and already plan on adding contained vines, miniature trees, succulents, etc. They make the apartment more homey and more mine.

3. Time makes being single easier: This summer marked a full year of being single. Since my ex and I broke up in July 2013, I’ve had flings here and there along with an on and off situation that has lasted for years, but nothing official and nothing with commitment. At first it was difficult, but throughout the summer I grew to truly enjoy being alone. I don’t like to share my couch, I enjoy my alone time after work, I use my entire bed and hate sharing. I am allowed to take off for the country when I want, able to go out with my friends at last minute, and figure out that not talking to someone after a tiring day at work is wonderful. It sounds cliche and boring, but for an introvert like myself — it is really a relief.

4. A clean apartment is essential: When I first moved in, my apartment was a mess. Nothing was organized correctly, everything was in piles, things were just thrown into drawers, onto the floor and into the sink. Now, I cannot deal with too many dishes piling up in the sink, the carpets are vacuumed once a week, everything is dusted every other week, and clothes are picked up off of the floor. I have found that I am able to enjoy my space far much more when everything is put in its proper place and organized in a way that makes room for potential.

5. The right people enter your life at the right time: Before the summer, I was in a place where I preferred being alone, didn’t go out, and had issues with friendships fading in and out of my life. However, the right people who are supposed to be in your life come in when you least expect it. Over the summer, I have found incredible friends at work. Some I have grown closer to, some have been working just for the summer — but when I needed people to have fun with and who enjoyed doing what I did, they entered my life. There is no need to force people to stay in your life when they exhaust you. Friendships are to be work, but at the same time, the best friendships are a breath of fresh air.

6. You can’t please everyone: How cliche is this? Sadly, it is but it is very true! I am not the kind of person who is willing to please everyone. I will go above and beyond for people who treat me well and who mean a lot to me, but there are also those who I will probably not get along with because of various reasons. I have found this out about myself: I will treat you well if you treat me well, if you do not treat me well — I will not go that extra step. I thought something was wrong with me because there are people I was not getting along with, but instead it was simply the way I was wired because of how they were treating me first.

It’s so nice to be back, readers! Expect more this fall!

Not Having a Love Life?

I was having just another normal night procrastinating from washing the dishes from this morning that were in my sink when I came across this:

Credit: Tumblr

Those words were staring back at me when I realized, like LC at the time, I’m not having a love life right now…at all. No fling, no boyfriend, no interests — nothing. There was nothing going on in my love life and I began to wonder, should I be sad about this or is this possibly making me happy for once?

After four and a half years of relationships that never could make me quite happy as I wanted to be, I have found the greatest relationship — with myself. Having a busy life involving college, work, and keeping up with my social life while finding time for myself makes it really difficult to have a relationship anyway. I would be substituting one of the four things that take up my time for a relationship and that’s not worth it being in my early twenties.

Sure, I miss the reassurance of a relationship: the supportive hug, the warm cuddling after a long day, being able to vent to someone who understands you — but at the end of the day, I have my friends who are just as supportive. I also have learned how to rely on myself for support. I journal, color when I need something mindless to do, and I go home to my mom one day a week for a glass of wine and moral support for life. However, after all of the unhappy relationships and meaningless flings I’ve been involved with, having no love life allows me to focus on me and what I want in life. It keeps me productive with the simple things in life, allows me to focus on school, and helps me focus on expanding my ever growing wardrobe.

LC has an incredible point with not having a love life. Instead of going out there and finding someone, it is most important to focus on you and focusing on developing the best of yourself instead of finding someone just to keep the bed warm at night instead of someone you truly want to share a life with. Reflecting, meditating, and making sure to exercise helps make you feel good about yourself instead of finding someone who will do it for you.

Day 1 of 30 Day Challenge

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Yes, I am doing a 30 day challenge on my blog. However, it is one that I carefully chose one that would involve reflective writing, which is what a blog is for right? For the next 30 days I will be writing whatever the prompt gives me. With that, I challenge you to write these as well. You can put them on Tumblr or just write for yourself. Give it a try!

DAY 1: Your current relationship, if you’re single talk about single life.

Well, I’m single….and my single life is full of crushes mostly. There’s nothing too exciting going on. I’ve been hanging out with some guys, gone on a couple of dates, flirted — nothing too exciting or abnormal. I go out, have drinks, enjoy time with guys I like and call it good. Between work and school, having a relationship would be a little difficult right now. So I like the single life. It’s different from what I’m used to. In May of last year, my boyfriend of almost two years and I broke up. It was a decent transition and then I had a couple month fling with a guy, which felt like a relationship. It was hard to keep up the time and finish what I needed to get done. Single life allows me to focus and be more productive.

Mostly, I’ve been on some bad dates. I think this is what I hate most about single life. The dates where they are super into you, but there’s nothing clicking on your part. Sure, they buy you food and drinks, but there’s no connection. Basically, you’re forcing conversation until they drop you off at your car or your apartment. I prefer just hanging out with guys instead of doing the awkward dates. It’s too much pressure and too much disappointment at times.

Could I get into a relationship? I would have to be ready and ease into it. But mostly, I’m taking the time to learn how to love myself while having some fun on the side. I think I’m doing what’s best for me.