Best Tweets of the Fall

Pic Credit: Twitter

I did it for the summer and now I’m doing it for the fall! These are my best tweets of the season. Be sure to follow me on Twitter : @trishasteffens

My life flashes before my eyes when I can’t find my other fuzzy sock. #trishaproblems #fuzzysocks

If it was acceptable, I would start today off with a shot of whiskey. #canijustleaveforvacaynow #whatdoesntkillyouonlymakesyoustronger

Ditching my bed and episodes of #TrophyWife was definitely a bad idea. #notplaying #stillsick #whyamihere

No Edward, you look like a drag queen when you sparkle, not a killer. #twilightproblems #hehe #butseriously

I make it a goal to make my life look like it belongs on Tumblr. #trishaproblems #prettythingsinlife

Instead of eating pizza, I reblog pictures of pizza. #pizzaproblems #closeenough

The air is even cleaner here….can we go back to Seattle now? #Portlandproblems #afterbeinginportlandfortwoseconds

I just don’t understand those people who want to be friends with me. #stop #idontlikeclingypeople #leavemealone

RETWEET Kat Dennings: “Sometimes instead of studying, I eat tortellini”

When the CEO of Victoria Clipper gets quoted calling himself a “dumbass” #keepitprofessional #facepalm

I’m that person who drives 20 mph over the speed limit and gets mad at other people for driving slow… #ihaveproblems #speeddemon #ijustwannagethomedammit

Let’s stop all of this not talking and eye glances and make out already. #latetweet #yesterday #truestory #isawyou

My closet is turning into #Nordstrom. #workproblems #workflow #love #illgetitatwork

Only we would drunk text someone with the intention of sounding like #KristinCav #lagunabeachproblems

I just wrote three sentences — rewarding myself with Twitter. #collegeproblems #noshame #dontwannawritethispaper

Randomly revising Albert Camus’ #TheStranger to a more urban modern setting. #onlyincomclass #nerdtimeswithjaimie

A 90% on a paper I wrote in fifteen minutes? Kay thanks. #didnteventry #collegelife

I’m a compulsive Nordstrom shopper and I’m not even sorry about it. #sorrynotsorry #nordstromproblems

“If you are brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.” -Paul Coehlo. #holla #truthbetold

Why do I always get myself into trouble when I come back to Skagit County? #trishaproblems #canthelpmyself #herewegoagain

According to #TheVampireDiaries we all get #doppelgangers when we turn into #vampires. #dafuq

Only I would sit in New Testament theology and wonder if Jesus was hot… #trishaproblems #onlyme #tooearlyforthis

Well, how long do you wait for the hero to realize he’s the hero? #iquotemyself

“If you’re going to throw your life away, he better have a motorcycle!” – Lorelai Gilmore #gilmoregirls #thesenights #lovethisquote

 

You’re Forgetting How to Act Part 28

Pic Credit: Tumblr

Happy New Year readers! In light of the New Year, it’s time to remind you guys how to act!

1. Just because you post “New Year, New Me” doesn’t mean you will change magically. #thenewyeardoesntchangeeverything#cloggingmynewsfeed

2. I completely judge those people who makes an Instagram account for their pets. #theycantactuallypost #dontyouhavealife

3. Despite what people say, reading is ACTUALLY cool. #booknerd #beingsmartisawesome #whodoesntread

4. At least once a year, a girl needs to watch the entire Sex and the City series in order to remember how to be an independent, strong woman. #insightfulshow #reallifeadvice #ilovemrbig #iamacarriemeetsasamanatha

5. Instead of eating pizza, I just reblog pictures of pizza on Tumblr. #trishaproblems #ilovepizza #cheesygoodness

6. I’m really sorry but posting throwback pictures of people that you used to be friends with is just a little pathetic….especially on Facebook. #facepalm #pleasedonttorturetherestofus #omg

7. Speaking of Facebook, no one really wants to know about how “awkward” it was that your brother’s friend saw you half naked while you were walking in your house. We all know, it wasn’t that awkward for you. #youliketheattention #idontwannaknow #pleasestoptalking

8. When a guy tells you that you aren’t easy and yet manages to drive twenty minutes in the wee hours of the morning just to talk to you, probably cares a lot more than he wants to admit. #thoseguys #sometimesthosenightsareneeded

9. Newsflash guys: when you cancel on a girl, never ask to see them, or hardly text them first — they’re going to stop trusting you. #truestory #sorrynotsorry #areyouthatoblivioustolife

10. Sometimes, I feel like I’m meant to be fight evil supernatural entities, and then I realize I’m human. #sadstory #trishaproblems #ohwell #watchingtoomuchgrimm