You’re Forgetting How to Act Part 34

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1. The media has decided that we care more about what celebrities are having babies or getting divorced than the fact that major crap is going down in Ukraine right now. #getittogether #beinformed #thisisimportant #foreignpolitics

2. You know that you need to reevaluate your life when your apartment is consistently a mess, when you are struggling to get anything finished, and you feel like nothing productive is happening in your life. #lifestruggles #strugglebus #timetogetmyacttogether

3. A truly resourceful woman will make sure she does not have to pay for a single drink when she goes out with guys. #truestory #talkyourwayintoit #iknowhowtoworkaroom #hehe

4. The best friendships are the ones that bring you back to life. They are the ones where you could lay out in the grass on sunny day and read next to each other, the ones where you could sit on your bed and talk all night long, the ones who understand you regardless of the fact that you believe you are slowly losing yourself even further. #truth #friendships #ilovemyfriends #thoselittlethingsinlife

5. Please stop making generalizations and assumptions about Native Americans in your power point presentation. You’re not getting all of your facts correctly, oh, look, there wasn’t even a website cited… #pleasegetyourfactsright #generalizingdoesnthelpanything #yourewhitestoptalking

6. Buying from Amazon and Nordstrom is supporting local business. #seattleproblems #seattlecompanies #getonmylevel #supportlocalbusinesses

7. When you actually get offended that your best friend didn’t send you pictures of the sink full of their roommates dirty dishes. #hehe #onlyjaimiegetsme #whyyesiaminterestedinyourdishdilemma #truefriendshiprighthere

8. Going back to your roots is probably the best thing to do when you’re having a hard time getting back onto your path. Losing yourself is one thing, but getting back is another. It reminds you of who you were before and why the people in your life are so important. Stay the weekend with your parents, go back to old routines, reconnect with old friends – find that new perspective in the old. #littlethings #movingoninlife #goingbacktoyourrroots #helpfuladvice

9. Yes, I do glare at people when they ask me if I’m on the Nordstrom app on my iPhone. #icanthelpmyself #pleasedontforcemetodeleteit #itsaproblemohwell

10. Don’t fight with pain. Give yourself into it in order to completely heel right whatever hurts. Fighting will only make it worse and will only force you to stay in denial and from truly growing. #pain #gettingpastit #feelingssuck

You’re Forgetting How to Act Part 33

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1. Only a real gentleman will pay for a girl’s parking, even when she visits for only thirty minutes. #keepitclassyboys #thisishowwedo #thatswhatimtalkingabout

2. Am I the only girl on the planet who truly doesn’t even care that Friday is Valentines Day? #overit #everyonestopwhining #itsjustanotherday

3. If you’re a guy and begging me to “send a picture” (no matter how appropriate or inappropriate you want it to be), you can bet your ass that I’m going to be a bitch to you. #notevengonnalie #notgonnaworkonmebuddy #canwehavesomeclasshereplease #whereareyourmanners

4. Most girls get really excited when they start to like a new guy. Not me. My thoughts end up looking like this: “Oh no. Please stop this. No. I can’t like him. I don’t like people. Noooooo. Make this torture stop. Put me out of my misery.” #idontlikelikingguys #ughicantdealwithfeelings #canijustnot #helpmeee

5. If I haven’t spoken to you in over a month, odds are I will not reply to your stupid Facebook message to me, including some lame link about something that I don’t even care enough about. AND THEN, end your message with “Hope you are well!” Um, we aren’t friends. You are a douche. #patheticguys #youruinedthisyourself #goodluckbeingadoucheinlife #iwantnothingtodowithyou #isecrelyhopeyoureadthispost

6. Guys are just as self-conscious as girls with what they say. Guys say certain things when they really mean something or like a girl, they don’t pull the “If you meet my friends…” out of nowhere. #butreally #okayicandothis #butreally

7. You are not allowed to use the phrase, “Oh no honey” when you still live with your parents, buy cheap clothes, and use cheap, caky makeup. #pleasestop #youarenotthatgreat #youropinionisirrelevantinthegrandschemeoflife #facepalmforyou

8. Despite the fact that Sarah Dessen is an author for “young adults”, I always feel refreshed with a new perspective when I read one of her books. Often too, a little hopeful about life. #thosestories #readingisgoodforthesoul

9. I already know I am getting a new tote and sunglasses with my tax refund money because that is the only way I’m getting new ones. #ineedthemreally #michaelkorsitout #iloveworkingatnordstrom

10. Find that one thing in life that brings you a peace of mind: whether it is laying on your bed listening to Keane, reading one of your favorite books over, going for a late night drive with the right music — find that. It will help bring clarity to your mind and allow you to breathe a little easier. #lifeadvice #butreally #peaceisagoodthing #breathedeeper

You’re Forgetting How to Act Part 29

1. Can we just discuss that season 3 premiere of #Girls?! I mean #OMGlikeOMG, I just can’t get over it. #isecretlylikeadam #jessainrehab

2. Whenever you want a pointless debate about “what is art?” between freshman in your creative writing class to end, just explain how art is relative and how it is all up to the individuals interpretation. Those freshman will shut up because there’s no way to argue against that. #upperclassmanproblems #lowerlevelucorclasses #creativewritingisjusttoolong #nofreshmanboyyouarenotsmarterthanme

3. The best way to spin a new perspective on life is to rearrange your apartment. Feng shui actually works! #thoselittlethings #oldapartmentnewview

4. Big thank you to the guys on #CapitolHill who yelled out when they heard Lenny Kravitz’s “Fly Away” blasting from my car. #hysterical #onlyoncaphill #lennykravitzrules

5. Whoever hasn’t seen #ChicagoPD is just missing out on one of the best cop shows on TV. #justsaying #andidontsaythatveryoften

6. At Seattle U, we use novels more than actual textbooks. #privateschoolproblems #thebestwaytolearn #icandeal

7. Since when did owning a cheap purse and having terrible roots constitute for being able to think you’re better than everyone else? Oh yeah, right….it doesn’t. Fix your roots, buy an actual bag. #shutupplease #omgthoserootsaresobad #cringing #rollingmyeyes #socialhierarchiesconfusesme

8. Who knew that the lack of one person in your life could make your life so much less complicated? #thoselittlethings #feelingfree #itsover

9. This #LennyKravitz t-shirt I bought at #Nordstrom is one of the greatest pieces of clothing I have ever owned. #nexttomyjoiesweater #ilovenordstrom #omgsoawesome

10. At this age, you’ve got to do what’s best for you. You won’t be able to later, so do it now. Whether it’s quitting, moving on, moving forward, starting something – just do it because you might regret it later. #lifesucks #myadvice

Trisha’s Top Tweets of Summer

In memory of the passing of Summer 2013, I am publishing on my blog my top summer tweets. If you care to follow me, my Twitter is @trishasteffens 🙂 Check it out!

You have never had an IPA? And WHY was I in love with you? #wecantbefriends #goodbeer #whodrinkscoors

“Just tell me I’m yours. Because I am. No need for expectations or commitment. It’s just the way it is. It just IS.”

Am I the only former Coug that is excited it’s HUSKY FOOTBALL?! #uwalumkid #purpleinmyblood #GoDawgs

I am that white girl blasting Tech Nine. #trishaproblems #whitegirlproblems

So I don’t think I will be buying food this week. #spentalmostallmymoney #longchamp #shopping #toomanyclothes #noshame

I can’t handle that again sober. #truelife #awksitations #whereisthetequila

Only my family would have bonding time time by sitting out on the deck and smoking clove cigars. #familytime #familybonding #toofunny #dysfunctional

When your best friend is your wingman and she isn’t even there. #stuffmorgantexts #bestiesfolyfe #wingwoman

I keep wanting him to text back, but then I remember he’s kind of driving a boat. #seattlegirlproblems #guys #boats #seattlelife

Those days when your cat decides he’s a model. #showingoff #mycathasmentalissues #justanothernight

RETWEET: “I high five girls after sex, not cuddle. I don’t want them to get the wrong idea.”

I keep a bottle of wine on hand in case of emergencies. #emergencywine #wineisgood #thetrishalife

RETWEET: “The best thing about pre-season football is getting to pretend that Tony Romo is not the Cowboys’ quarterback.”

RETWEET: “The only insults I will ever take seriously on Twitter are from gay teenagers.”

I wish I was Nina Dobrev. #trishaproblems #TVDhottie

Love is never the answer, TEQUILA is the answer. #duh #ofcourse #tequilaisreal #loveisnotreal

It’s hard to be better than someone when you’re obsessed with rodeos…#truelife #ew #pleasestoptalking #yourenotclassy #hicksitellya

When you dream about the Vampire Diaires and never want to be woken up again. #stefanwasmyboyfriend #dontwakemeup #torture #sadnow

I’m 87% sure I’m a mermaid. #truelife #trishaproblems #lifehappens #mermaidproblems

I have decided I need more cookbooks…and maybe some food to cook with. #trishaproblems #iamnotdomestic #whatiscooking

“It’s going to be….sex” #stuffmorgansays #bestfriends #truethoughts

I don’t think I’m going to be “passive aggressive” Trisha today. #pissedoff #sassy #trishaproblems

When your best friend hits on the random Australian living in your house. #drunkproblems #littlemorganthings

I am pretty sure the apocalypse is happening in Skagit Valley. #mountvernonwildfire #skagitvalleywashington #icanseeitfrommyhouse #anotherdayinthelifeof

I am pretty sure I am still hungover from being drunk 24 hours ago… #trishaproblems #tequilaismyfriend #latenights #yolo

Every day I think to myself, “I wonder what stupid shit my ex did today” just for pure amusement. #stupidpeoplemakemelaugh #imabitchdontcare

The moment when your mom helps you sneak a boy out of your house who snuck in through the window. #badboys #dayinthelifeof #trishaproblems

Liking you is really putting a damper on my life. #crushproblems

“I feel like you would be a manwhore, but I feel like this (gestures to the face) gets in the way.” -Morgan to James #stuffmorgansays #clipperattendantconvos #bestfriend #omg

I hate when people you love to stalk on Instagram put their settings on private. #wth #idontwanttofollowyou #dammit

95% of the time, I cannot deal with my feelings towards boys. #truelife #trishaproblems #sometimesiwishiwasalesbian

I want a big girl job…and a cup of coffee. A BIG cup of coffee. #tired. #caffeineisneeded #crankymorningperson

“Germs make you vomit. GERMS make weird stuff grow on your privates.” #stuffjamessays #clipperattendantconvos #germs

The awkward moment when half of your ex boyfriends are married. #iam20 #awksituations #hahayouuglay #trishaproblems

I had 666 friends, so I deleted one because I couldn’t deal with the number. #trishaproblems #sorrynotsorry #evilnumber #superstitiousashell

True guy friends seduce boys using your phone. #ihaveweirdfriends #bromisaweirdo #lovemycoworkers

I still manage to throw something at the TV when LC choose Jason over Paris at the end of season one of the Hills. #theHills #flashback #LC #hateJason

Giving your mom a pair of cowboys boots you don’t wear in exchange for her paying your chiropractor bill. #trishaproblems #billsbillsbills #dowhatigottado

“I’ve had periods longer than that.” #stuffdesnisays #bestfriend #yourenotinloveafteraweek

I should have my own show called “The Cat Whisperer.” #crazycatlady #ilovecats #theytalktome

I really need to stop watching #TeenWolf and start working on my resume. #howoldamiagain #ilovewerewolves #cantstopwatchingthisshow

Never give up on someone who texts you after a bridge collapse. #iwillneverunderstandhim #wtfiswrongwithyou

If I hear one more girl use the word “hubby” I will have a nervous breakdown and become a werewolf. #truelife #notcute #trishaproblems #iamsecretlyawerewolf

My intoxicated mother informed me she will be living until she is 120. #mothers #trishaproblems #wineisalwaystheanswer

When you sit your cat and dog down for the “vacuum cleaners are not monsters” talk. #ineedtogobacktowork #yesitalktomypets #imgoingcrazy

When you tell your mother, “I don’t answer the door anyway, then I have to talk real people and not the dog…” #trishaproblems #ihatepeople #pleasedonttalktome

When Amanda Knox’s book becomes way more interesting than anything else going on in your life. #cantstopreading #sogood #kindlebooks

When your cat pretends he’s dying just so you will let him into your room. #mycathasmentalissues #jesusyouscaredme #crazycatlady

Ian and Nina broke up? No. No. No. I can’t deal. #teamdamonforever #favcelebcouple #perfecttogether #TVDcouples #dyinginside

 

You’re Forgetting How to Act Part 12

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1. Stop having expectations when it comes to guys. It will lead to more fun and fewer disappointments.

2. If you are walking around Seattle with an umbrella — you are either wearing an adorable outfit or a tourist.

3. Ellie Goulding is a musician you need to listen to right this second. Go!

4. Love & Other Drugs is more than just a romantic comedy and Jake Gyllenhaal taking his shirt off. It’s a modern satire on the pharmaceutical industry #duh #payattentionpeople.

5. If you look innocent I will: 1) be suspicious of you and not like you or 2) want to corrupt you.

6. It is not classy to be rude to attendants, retail personnel, or waiters who are you providing you with a customer service. #keepitclassy

7. I still don’t understand why everyone is giving Snowden so much attention. That’s what he wants right? #ignoringstupidpeople

8. PINK sweatshirts are perfect for a casual look and have the cutest colors, but remember that sweatshirts are not an entire wardrobe.

9. Loving yourself is a lot harder than it sounds, but it is possible. Be yourself and not who you think you should be.

10. Washington lawmakers have finally made a decision about the freaking state budget. What, did Inslee deny them all food? #thingsmymomsays